Spiky hair big saucer eyes and a lot of yelling, just to cross the street.

I tried posting the other day, but I have like a mountains worth of new anime that im watching and trying to watch/read something that’s in another language think about something relevant to post on here is next to impossible. But since im such a geek I took time off from my anime...

I think I still have like one complete series to watch and a new one coming in a few days

..To post on here, truth be told battlestar galactica is on and I missed the last half hour so im waiting for that, the one new thing that I’ve learned from my endless anime watching. And it's so very true:

You can't walk into someone’s heart without treading in a little dirt

When I head that, or rather when I read that I was like damn that's true, no matter how you look at it. You can't just come into someone’s life all new and shit without dealing with all the other past things that have gone on in their lives and the same goes for when people come into our lives they bring all types of dirt with them. They walk into and out of our lives and leave foot prints that mark us long after their gone.
I found this in a childs cartoon, from Japan. Now yes the anime more than likely comes on later in the night cause of how they do the anime scheduling over there but still....the statement is profound.

Wolf

Fresh back from vacation, It’s my sanity!!!!!!!

You know im fortunate to have a sounding board who is ass good to me as L.S. Truth be told I would have gone crazy from these past two days if she hadn't given me words of advise....

Yes it was advise ya like giving it and can't do anything about that

....Honestly I almost went completely nuts. I forget sometimes that the journey is the thing and it's not the beginning or the end that matters. I don’t think though I've reached my limits of what I can learn from being up here, I just from time to time get inundated with the way I lead my life. It's not that I have a problem with it, it's just some of the obstacles seem larger than they should and I forget the lessons that I’ve learned long ago.

Damn im long winded

Long story short im allot better thanks to me sounding off on a very dear friend of mine and I wouldn't change her very comforting slaps in the face for anything.

Well maybe a few things. I mean im not into that whole slaps in the face are cool crowd. Maybe some comforting rubbing, yeah rubbings nice, or if I couldn't get that “many kisses" I'm a big fan of the "many kisses" maybe with a comforting phrase thrown in after each kiss. Just a thought.

Wolf

Personal Space

I tried to go to sleep tonight with out posting anything. But as people can see I've been kinda down lately. Right now im sleeping on the couch , my most favorite of places to be in this place, just wishing that i had my own damn room so i could lay my head and just not be bothered by the daily goings on of this apartment. Two of my roomates now have thier own rooms i really dont know if they realize what kinda of fortune has smiled on them. Now yes i could have opted to pay more in rent to get my own room, but thats not the point here. I dont even really share a room as you can tell by the disporpptionate , i might have spelled that wrong, ammount of times that i write about me being on the damn couch. My roommate uses the tv in our room for his x-box so it's not like i can watch tv in my room, im honestly debateing weither to put my pc back in there it's not like if/when i get kicked out ill be able to use it and that was the whole reason for me to get the damn thing fixed, right? I miss having my own space, i dont have that anymore. I dont know if that comes from being an adult or what but who ever signed off for this to be apart of me being grown up really screwd tha pooch on this one. Do you honestly know what it feels like to come home and see some one else doing what you wanted to do. I can't even count the nights that i've come in here and have seen someone on my computer, and then while im out here watching tv have my roomate say his girl is comeing over.......

Truth be told the chic is here now, i would love to be in my bed all nice and warm sleeping away the night but NOOOOOo, not me man i get to be up nice and awake until the fucking cows come home.

.....I swear i hate this place and need a vacation is what i need but i use my vacation time so i can have a roof over my head, but that another thing all together I think. Ofcourse the solution to al of this would be me getting my own place, but baby steps, baby steps. I guess until that pops off, as the kids say, I got to suck all this shit up, keep a happy face a stiff upper lip so to speak. Ehhhhh my life used to be so simple.

wolf

I'm Tiered

By all that is sacred in this world I’m tiered. It's not the physical kind either, that I can deal with. It's the deep down soul sick feeling that I currently have no clue of what my next step is why should I even move from this spot kind of tiered. It's Friday night and here I am in my apt typing in this blogg whining to no one in particular, but I feel like I need to tell some one so it's on here for the world at large to see. So back to my original statement, Im tiered. I mean honestly I have no girlfriend...

All the women that I’ve dealt with over the past year something has been off about them

...I don’t really want to hit the club anymore....

Not that the club up here counts as a club

I don’t even want to really go to work, but I have to so that’s not even an option. Hell I turn 26 in a lil over a week, and here I sit alone uncared for by anyone outside of my friend group. Is that the truth of this whole thing? A person once told me that I would die alone, I know that at the time anger played a big part of the person saying that, but I’ve always thought that and for the most part I still do. Now I know that some people would tell me that I have my friends so im not alone in this world, and still others would say that God loves you and is there for you so in that respect your not alone in this world. But, where is my person that looks at me and sees past all the bullshit and masks, they might be the same thing, and wants to be with me for me? I miss having a persons arms around me letting me know everything will be fine even though my whole life looks like shit. I miss being able to talk to people on the phone just because or go over their house and just sit there, and do nothing. Everything I do now, it's like it has to have a purpose I can't just do something just to do it. Well that’s not true there has been one thing that I can do just because I want to. And most, no scratch that all of my male friends would be like that the best you’re so lucky you can pick up a chic and you can take her home that night. I DONT FUCKING WANT THAT! Do they have any idea of how hollow that is, now physically yes its enjoyable im not knocking that, but I would just like to go to a place with a woman and come home with her. I know I know maybe that’s the creators way of showing me that I should look for something more substantial, and dammed if im not trying. What the hell was with me falling for a woman whose family doesn’t like black guys? What was the lesson in all that? 'cause if it was don’t date people with racist family members I got that no problem. But then to add insult to injury you have me find out that not two moths later shes moved the fuck on with some construction worker redneck mother fucker?!!!?!?!?!?

I swear the more I think about all that I would just love to be able to control time so I could walk to her home or place of business and skin her and her family alive and wear their hides for a fucking suit, I would pay a tailor to make the suit and matching shoes, cause im fairly certain you can tan human flesh, and maybe a hat to go with it. Then once it's out of my system set things straight again and everything would be cool.

Now we have this latest farce of a relationship, and for the record no it wasn't a relationship. And no I don’t think I was wrong for not calling her, she gets off work at 1 in the morning and when I have to get up at 6 for work that means ya ass ain't getting called, sorry if that makes me a jerk and you want to kill me for it. GET IN LINE. So what the fuck was up with that? 'cause I sure as hell don’t know.
Some times I think im better off by myself, but then I get pains like this one, and I know it wont be the last, but it hurts ya know? I sit here and I see my roommates go out with their girls friends and they smile and laugh and they spend time with them, and im like where’s mine. It's like that scene in Olivier twist where he's asking the guy can he have some more, and all I get is the "MOOORe!" part of the whole thing like im the dumbass for looking for some more, like I ran out of what I was allotted and there ya have it. No more for you sorry were fresh out, try back next month, and then I come back next month and their like oh yeah see the thing about that is our shipments late sooo your order isn't going to come in. And I swear that life is just giving me the big run around that’s not going to stop until im dead and then as im fading away the nurse is going to look at my chart and say Robert Peterson, I had the biggest crush on you when we were young and my last words will be "sonofabitch", and that’s what they will put on my tombstone. You know what im going to watch anime until I pass out im done with this fucking shit.........

wolf

Comments, life, blogg, otherwise

First up:

"If I could clone a male version of myself could I then marry myself?
Would that be incest do you think?"
L.S

Thats not incest I would think that would end up being a very odd form of masturbation. It's still you genetically well now that I really think about it I guess it would be incest cause that would kinda be your brother, wait I dont even think that your clone would have sex with you cause if it's a true clone then it would remmber being a female and only like guys so you would end up having the best shopping partner ever, maybe kinda sortof..... Anyway.

Second:
L.s your still right about H. I have devoted many a bored day/night at work to the myriad of ways that i could and will ruin her existance if and when i get the chance. Oh the wailling and nashing of teeth there will be when vengaince will be mine. Man, i should be a supervillian when i grow up, hehehe.

Ummm third kinda:

I realized after this one small forray into the dating pool that women are nutz. Now i've always known this to be true, But!!!!!!!!!!! ;yes with a cap B and sticks with dots, I have never had it in my face crazy as i've had this past weekend. Ok cats and kittens let me lay the scene for you:
I was spending time with this very lovely lady, ya digg, now i dont mean like an hour or two. I was with her like the eniter weekend and shit. Now here comes tuesday i wake up in her bed as the wolf is want to do, she she tells me the night/day before that shes going to be busy the rest of the week. So the adult in me is like cool cool ill call you on friday and we can hang and dig the scene with each other. So i calls on Friday and to the mans supprise no call back. So im like thats fine and i goes about my day, knowing that she would be at the same shindig that i was attending. Ok fastforward to that rather cool and sexy night, im dressed just this shy of "to the nines" me and a associate of mine stepp into the place take in the scene and after about fifteen minutes I see ms lady, ill call her L......

ON aside i really like calling people by the first letter of their first name I can talk about people all day and if they ready this they have no idea.

...... I ask if the seat next to her is taken she says no and then she being to bitch me out?!!?!?!?!?! So im like Wtf is going on. She tells me that i haven't called her in five days.....

It wasn't five days it was more like three. I was with her tuesday mornning and then i called her on Friday

......and that she is so far beyond pissed at me that everyday she didnt hear from me she got madder. So after a fashion i got up and left her to stew in her own self ipossed idocy and bounced to aonther club. So yeah women are crazy beyond a shadow of a doubt. Either that or im curse to not find someone who in her infinate crazyness want to be with me.

I think that last section will fall into the otherwise section and ill will call this post done.

Wolf